Perfect

"Aim at perfection in everything, though in most things it is unattainable. However, they who aim at it, and persevere, will come much nearer to it than those whose laziness and despondency make them give it up at unattainable." -Lord Chesterfield

Yesterday, Nicole and I were talking about identity formation: how in adolescence you have to figure yourself out and work through the conflicts and events holding you back before you can move forward and focus on other parts of your life experience. In a stroke of luck, this conversation coincided with an episode of Grey's Anatomy I just watched (Grey's Anatomy is my new thing, don't judge.) The idea is there are a lot of things in life that you have to handle in sequential order. It's all a process.

I find the concept of perfection to be so strange. It doesn't exist, and I'm not even sure we could conceptualize something that is truly perfect. I mean, there's a reason why the Islamic traditions maintains that  Allah is the sole perfect being. I dislike the word "perfect." I never want it to be used to describe me by anyone I know, not by my family members, not by my friends, not by someone I'm dating, not even by a stranger on a street. I don't want to hear that I'm perfect. I want to hear that I am flawed, but that I am using my flaws to every advantage I can, that I'm learning and growing because of them. I'm never going to wake up, look in the mirror, and tell myself I'm perfect. However, I may tell myself that I've made some pretty great progress, that I can handle a situation better today than I was able to the day before.

I don't necessarily think conceptualizing perfection as the goal is helpful. To have a perfect state be the end stop everyone's fighting for removes emphasis from the sheer process of improving, and I think everyone should be constantly striving for improvement in all that they do. That doesn't mandate being discontent in everything you've done, it's actually being content with the level of effort you've put in. It's finding contentment in accepting where you're at and knowing you've got work to do, but that you're actually doing the work. If everyone looked around and thought, "Well, everything's perfect, nothing left to do but go home," we wouldn't have innovation! I don't think people should see themselves in a similar way.

At the end of the day, our value lies not in that we can attain perfection, (we can't) but that we can identify opportunities for change and improvement, and that's a pretty cool thing.

Peace and love,

-Megan

How To: Watch People Grow

A week ago, I got back from a 10 day adventure across the country with 40 other people to the ELCA National Youth Gathering, saw the ocean, overtook New Orleans with 37,000 other Lutherans, walked into an empty Superdome, got terribly ill, went on a few roller coasters, and had the greatest pleasure of watching people grow.

My home for the past two weeks - bus 718!

When I got on the bus early on the 14th of July, I expected it to be like any other trip... and I was right. It was full of crazy loud teenagers, high tensions, sleep deprivation, and good conversations. But something was different - I was able to watch it all. I had been a student on the last trip to the Youth Gathering in 2009, which was an amazing experience. Now three years later, I decided to tag along for this trip.

I had five "children" in my group, most of whom I knew before this trip. Our conversations in the beginning were rough and a bit sluggish, as expected, but on the last two days something unexpected for me happened. The conversation flowed and flourished and I heard things I never even thought of before. I saw eyes with a new spark and I knew that beyond this trip is where real growth will be seen.

I also saw Megan grow. We had someone drop out of the trip a few months before we left and my mom (the director of youth at my church) decided to invite Megan to go along. Megan was cautious and thought herself into a tizzy about it all. Although I was happy to have my partner-in-crime along for the trip, I was also excited to see her find some other partners-in-crime. And she did. I barely had time to talk to her. And since I cannot speak for her, here is what Megan thought of it all.

So what about me? It's hard to know. When I was younger, I knew if I had suddenly changed after camp and other 'mountain-top experiences'. But now that I'm older, it's harder to tell. I think after this trip and watching so many hearts and minds change, I can't help but feel I've changed and grown myself.

It seems to me that change is easier to see after a period of time. Comparing me a few weeks ago and me now, I can see the change. I dunno what that is, but it's there. I guess only time will tell with new experiences and new people, but I guess I'm ok with that.

Peace!

-Nicole

Releasing my Inner Child

1. Cut people some slack.  No one's perfect.
2. Keep some hummus around.
3. Some people don't like hugs, and that's okay.
4. It's okay to sleep with a teddy bear.

It's Megan.  Hope your week is going smoothly. At least it's almost the weekend right?

Woah.  I turn 20 in less than three months and I am TOTALLY freaking out about it.  It isn't so much added responsibility or massive lifestyle change as it is the number itself. 20.  That zero and absence of a one in the ten's place is just way too freaky.  At least agree with me that it's a really intimidating number.

I feel like a little kid again, just because I feel like I've regressed to a much younger state of mind.  College changes you to be more mature, but also more immature--not in bad ways, but just ways that remind you of when you were a little kid.

For example:
I get really excited over mac and cheese, french toast sticks, and hot cocoa.
I go nuts for candy and cartoons.
Hugs make everything better.
I lapse into random goofy spells
and...
I slept with a teddy bear.

You don't understand!  I slept with a teddy bear over break, not because I had to or because one was just there, but because I wanted to and it made me feel better.  I never slept with stuffed animals when I was a child, not because I didn't have any, but because I just didn't like to sleep with them.  I really didn't see the appeal at all.  In my defense, I slept with my dog a lot--but that's more like a living stuffed animal that gets really warm, starts panting, and then moves to another corner of the bed because she wants nothing to do with you...  I'm just surprised at how comforting a teddy bear can be, even at my age.

I don't know if this whole regression thing is a product of college or not, but I don't see it as bad, things like being goofy don't hurt anyone or anything. If anything, I'm staying young at heart right?  We all adore elderly folks who know how to have a good time or who can understand the mindset of a child and so maybe that's what I'm doing.  Heck, I hope I'm still breaking into random accents when I'm 85.  I will embarrass my grandkids SO much!

This year has allowed me to grow leaps and bounds as a person, both through personal insights and education.  I think it's okay for me (and all of us) to be able to laugh and access our inner children as well.

Peace, love, hugs, and high fives

-Megan