Steps:
1. Be patient.
2. Only talk when whoever is talking has finished their thought.
3. When you do talk, keep it to a limit. Only say things that are direct and things that don't put down.
When I was little, people always said I was a good listener. And in my opinion, I was. I could sit for hours and listen to people talk about anything and everything. I enjoyed hearing other's views on things and I didn't find it necessary to make my own opinion be heard. This also translated into my relationships with friends. Very rarely would I know a solution to a situation, but somehow just by listening and telling them my truth, it seemed to work out. Now that I'm a bit older, it has been flipped just a bit. I tend to want to have people know my opinion or if someone is in need of help, I talk more than is necessary.
The past few weeks, I have sought out some advice and someone to listen to me because things have come up in my life. I've discovered that more often than not, I knew the solution to the problem. What made me realize that solution was not always because of the person's words, but it was their attentiveness. They may have thought of solutions to the problems, but they refrained from telling me because I probably wouldn't have listened. What works for them, wouldn't work for me. A little direction is always helpful, but when they did give direction, it was never a command.
I've also discovered that when someone listens to me rant/complain/cry and they just allow me to do so, I begin to hear myself. I hear how ridiculous and irrational the words that are coming out of my mouth are. "Silence speaks more than words and actions" has been my rule of thumb when it comes to acting serious pieces/scenes. It gives the audience time to take the words spoken and process them. The silence is a breath, something to bring you back to the present. My mom always tells trip chaperons that during small group discussions, don't be afraid of silence. Know the kids are thinking and if they come up with an answer, it will be much more beneficial than you just giving them your answer. Silence in a conversation makes you think harder and figure things out.
Listening - it seems to be a lost art. But to those who have helped me through rough times and to anyone who has helped anyone, thanks for listening.
Peace!
-Nicole
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Friday, June 22, 2012
How To: Enjoy an Internship
Steps:
1. Accept the fact you must be there for the whole time.
2. Work with friends or if no friends are present, make some.
3. Pick an internship in an area you're interested in, but you are unsure about.
4. Stay calm when your boss frustrates you. Remind yourself that you're still an intern, no matter how much responsibility you have.
5. Remember that your main priority is to learn.
This summer, I was given an internship at a local theatre, primarily working with costumes. (We're doing How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying. Get the theme for blog this summer?) I'm still not sure if I want to continue getting a degree in theatre and I thought this was the perfect way to make it more clear. I thought I was going to love it and be so happy to go there every morning, but after the first week, I wasn't too happy to be an intern. I thought I was going to be doing costumes for most of my time there, but it turns out I also have to clean, take out garbage, and general maintenance things. I only was able to spend 3 hours doing costumes, which wasn't enough time for me to learn what I wanted to and for Jen, our designer, it wasn't enough time to get things done. I was increasingly becoming frustrated with the people (especially my boss), the work, and everything in-between.
After a week of increasing frustration and slight anger, I finally took a step back. Little did I remember that this is what I love to do. Not only would I be creating wonderful pieces of clothing, I would be doing it for kids (age 11-17, so not really kids, but younger than I). The designer, Jen, is wonderful (although crass at times) and is more than willing to teach me. I am working with friends who make me feel wonderful and who I still want to hang out with after work is done. (Favorite quotation so far is from Amanda, after we crashed a cart on the stairs to our office: "It's a waterfall of book knowledgeableness!")
I also was having issues with the time. I would be working 9 to 5 everyday and every Tuesday and Thursday, I would work an added three hours from 6 to 9. It was more than I thought I bargained for, but when I put it into perspective, I thought differently. It's a theatre production and even when I'm not paid, I put in more time than I am right now. Perspective, it works.
Then there was my boss. He was my professor for the two theatre classes I took and the director for the only play I was in this past year. Frankly, I was sick of him and his methods. And I wasn't the only one. Amanda and Erin, the other interns, are just as frustrated, if not more, with him. I've discovered that it makes no sense to be frustrated. The best thing I can do is stay calm and be reasonable when communicating with him.
And lastly, I remembered that an internship means a job where you learn. I think I have learned more about costumes in the few weeks I've worked than I have in the past couple of years. It's intensive learning and quite hands on. And not only that, but my learning will end up on stage, in front of crowds.
And I'm pretty proud of that.
Peace!
-Nicole
1. Accept the fact you must be there for the whole time.
2. Work with friends or if no friends are present, make some.
3. Pick an internship in an area you're interested in, but you are unsure about.
4. Stay calm when your boss frustrates you. Remind yourself that you're still an intern, no matter how much responsibility you have.
5. Remember that your main priority is to learn.
This summer, I was given an internship at a local theatre, primarily working with costumes. (We're doing How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying. Get the theme for blog this summer?) I'm still not sure if I want to continue getting a degree in theatre and I thought this was the perfect way to make it more clear. I thought I was going to love it and be so happy to go there every morning, but after the first week, I wasn't too happy to be an intern. I thought I was going to be doing costumes for most of my time there, but it turns out I also have to clean, take out garbage, and general maintenance things. I only was able to spend 3 hours doing costumes, which wasn't enough time for me to learn what I wanted to and for Jen, our designer, it wasn't enough time to get things done. I was increasingly becoming frustrated with the people (especially my boss), the work, and everything in-between.
After a week of increasing frustration and slight anger, I finally took a step back. Little did I remember that this is what I love to do. Not only would I be creating wonderful pieces of clothing, I would be doing it for kids (age 11-17, so not really kids, but younger than I). The designer, Jen, is wonderful (although crass at times) and is more than willing to teach me. I am working with friends who make me feel wonderful and who I still want to hang out with after work is done. (Favorite quotation so far is from Amanda, after we crashed a cart on the stairs to our office: "It's a waterfall of book knowledgeableness!")
I also was having issues with the time. I would be working 9 to 5 everyday and every Tuesday and Thursday, I would work an added three hours from 6 to 9. It was more than I thought I bargained for, but when I put it into perspective, I thought differently. It's a theatre production and even when I'm not paid, I put in more time than I am right now. Perspective, it works.
Then there was my boss. He was my professor for the two theatre classes I took and the director for the only play I was in this past year. Frankly, I was sick of him and his methods. And I wasn't the only one. Amanda and Erin, the other interns, are just as frustrated, if not more, with him. I've discovered that it makes no sense to be frustrated. The best thing I can do is stay calm and be reasonable when communicating with him.
And lastly, I remembered that an internship means a job where you learn. I think I have learned more about costumes in the few weeks I've worked than I have in the past couple of years. It's intensive learning and quite hands on. And not only that, but my learning will end up on stage, in front of crowds.
And I'm pretty proud of that.
Peace!
-Nicole
Thursday, May 24, 2012
How To: Fend Off a Sleepless Night
Steps: (not necessarily in order)
1. Get up and walk around.
2. Move to a different spot.
3. Drink some hot tea or warm milk.
4. Use some relaxation techniques.
5. Listen to soothing music.
6. Listen to white noise or other repetitive sound.
7. Read or write.
It seems like for me, I either sleep like a rock or I don't sleep at all. I have pulled my share of all-nighters, but not necessarily by choice. I just have a lot of issues sleeping, and sometimes they have a cause and sometimes they don't. I even went through this phase when I was in second grade where every night I would wake up at 2:00 am on the nose and I wouldn't be able to fall back asleep. I think my all-time record for consecutive hours awake is 38 (set shortly after the school year started), and a close second is sleeping for 11 hours over the course of 72 (set over our weekend at MBLGTACC '12) Not being able to sleep is a huge annoyance at best and a debilitating problem at worst, and most of us have issues sleeping at one point or another. It always seems to get worse for me over summer and I have quite a few friends who struggle with insomnia, so here are some of my tried and true methods for dealing with rough nights.
One suggestion I have is getting up and walking around or moving to another spot. I'll either walk around the house a few times or move to a couch, something I know my dad does as well. Usually I just hang out on the couch for a half hour or so and then move back to my bed and magically I'm able to find a comfortable spot and drift off. I think trouble sleeping has a lot to do with restlessness--either the body or mind gets stuck in one spot, so try changing it up a bit. Move to a couch or get a different pillow or something like that.
Now, I'm a huge tea fan and there are a lot of brands and types of tea marketed for their calming effects. My family swears by Sleepytime from Celestial Seasonings, and there's also Quietly Chamomile by Lipton. I think hot liquids help a lot in general as a means of relaxation. It may be a placebo, but I absolutely swear by a mug of warm milk. It works every time for me. I also recommend using some relaxation techniques, such as progressive relaxation which involves tensing and relaxing individual muscles. I usually start with my feet and work my way up, and it also works well for anxiety. Google it for more info. I also listen to music a lot, especially if I can't sleep in summer. There is some really great Native American flute music as well as acoustic guitar on Youtube which never fails to help me out. Also, listening to white noise or something repetitive. If you like to fall asleep to rain, you know what I'm talking about. I found that I could fall asleep pretty easily to the ticking of my watch or my dog's heartbeat.
Often times when I can't sleep it's due to thinking too much. I just can't seem to turn off my mind either because I'm worried about something or I have an idea that's bugging me. I suggest getting out a notebook and just jotting all the stuff down to get it out of your head. I also find writing things out, especially in a way that others would understand them, helps me to organize and better comprehend my ideas or the situation as a whole, instead of everything being jumbled up and scattered. Who knows, you might even find out you wrote something brilliant when you wake up. I keep a notebook under my bed and it has come in handy quite a bit. Also, reading a book for a little while might help relax you enough to fall asleep.
I hope some of these things work for you if you're having trouble sleeping, and you can always look up some techniques on your own. Good night, good luck, sweet dreams, and whatever you do, don't drink caffeine before bed!
With love and hugs,
-Megan
1. Get up and walk around.
2. Move to a different spot.
3. Drink some hot tea or warm milk.
4. Use some relaxation techniques.
5. Listen to soothing music.
6. Listen to white noise or other repetitive sound.
7. Read or write.
It seems like for me, I either sleep like a rock or I don't sleep at all. I have pulled my share of all-nighters, but not necessarily by choice. I just have a lot of issues sleeping, and sometimes they have a cause and sometimes they don't. I even went through this phase when I was in second grade where every night I would wake up at 2:00 am on the nose and I wouldn't be able to fall back asleep. I think my all-time record for consecutive hours awake is 38 (set shortly after the school year started), and a close second is sleeping for 11 hours over the course of 72 (set over our weekend at MBLGTACC '12) Not being able to sleep is a huge annoyance at best and a debilitating problem at worst, and most of us have issues sleeping at one point or another. It always seems to get worse for me over summer and I have quite a few friends who struggle with insomnia, so here are some of my tried and true methods for dealing with rough nights.
One suggestion I have is getting up and walking around or moving to another spot. I'll either walk around the house a few times or move to a couch, something I know my dad does as well. Usually I just hang out on the couch for a half hour or so and then move back to my bed and magically I'm able to find a comfortable spot and drift off. I think trouble sleeping has a lot to do with restlessness--either the body or mind gets stuck in one spot, so try changing it up a bit. Move to a couch or get a different pillow or something like that.
Now, I'm a huge tea fan and there are a lot of brands and types of tea marketed for their calming effects. My family swears by Sleepytime from Celestial Seasonings, and there's also Quietly Chamomile by Lipton. I think hot liquids help a lot in general as a means of relaxation. It may be a placebo, but I absolutely swear by a mug of warm milk. It works every time for me. I also recommend using some relaxation techniques, such as progressive relaxation which involves tensing and relaxing individual muscles. I usually start with my feet and work my way up, and it also works well for anxiety. Google it for more info. I also listen to music a lot, especially if I can't sleep in summer. There is some really great Native American flute music as well as acoustic guitar on Youtube which never fails to help me out. Also, listening to white noise or something repetitive. If you like to fall asleep to rain, you know what I'm talking about. I found that I could fall asleep pretty easily to the ticking of my watch or my dog's heartbeat.
Often times when I can't sleep it's due to thinking too much. I just can't seem to turn off my mind either because I'm worried about something or I have an idea that's bugging me. I suggest getting out a notebook and just jotting all the stuff down to get it out of your head. I also find writing things out, especially in a way that others would understand them, helps me to organize and better comprehend my ideas or the situation as a whole, instead of everything being jumbled up and scattered. Who knows, you might even find out you wrote something brilliant when you wake up. I keep a notebook under my bed and it has come in handy quite a bit. Also, reading a book for a little while might help relax you enough to fall asleep.
I hope some of these things work for you if you're having trouble sleeping, and you can always look up some techniques on your own. Good night, good luck, sweet dreams, and whatever you do, don't drink caffeine before bed!
With love and hugs,
-Megan
Friday, May 18, 2012
How To: Transition Back Home
(Here is our summer series - How To. To keep the blog going and to give you all something to read, I'd thought we'd give you updates in a different way than normal for the summer.)
Steps:
1. Move everything back into place - make it like it was before or even improve. Make sure everything that you don't want in your room at home is stored away from view. Make yourself as comfortable as possible in your space at home.
2. Find a job or at least something to keep you busy.
3. Talk to your friends from college about the transition - tell them it's hard if it is. Just be honest. But find a balance of when to talk and what to talk about.
4. Reconnect or make new connections with friends.
5. Don't be afraid to make plans for the next year.
Ah, summer. It's a wonderful time. Right now, it's about 90 degrees out and sunny as ever. I'm excited that I can finally wear tank tops and shorts and go barefoot outside, but lately, I've been a bit down. The transition back home has been rough for me, as for many of the other writers here and many of my other friends. I've spent some nights crying, some days unwilling to get out of bed, and other days are full of energy and joy.
We spend about 8 or 9 months away from home, determining how we should live our day to day lives, having a life that our parents have no idea what it consists of, unless we tell them. I flourished while in college (read previous posts for evidence). I became closer to people than I ever have and spent nearly every moment of my life in contact with someone. Now that it's summer, it's yet another change. My best friend from high school now lives in another state and my friends who are still in high school are, well, still in high school. It was easy while classes were still session to hang out with people because they were only two steps away in their own dorm room.
In the past few weeks since classes have finished, I've discovered a few things. First, I miss a lot of people and miss them more than I have missed people before. They became a part of me and it really does feel like I've lost part of myself. Second, it's hard to find a balance of communication with people. Not only the frequency, but what we talk about. And third, time alone is hard. It just is.
So here are some solutions I hope will work. First, be comfortable. I still have some of my dorm stuff sitting in my living room (my microwave, a shelving unit, etc). And because I'm in my living room a lot, it just reminds me of people and events and such. The more stuff I put away, the easier it is to enjoy my summer. Second, keep busy. I started my job about a week and a half ago and it makes me tired as ever and keeps me busy. I don't really have time to miss people. Third, talk to people about how you're doing. And it's ok to tell them you miss them. I've found that chances are, they miss you too. But don't just talk about that - talk about what you did that day and such. Also, find a balance of communication. If you are staying up or delaying an activity to wait for them to respond, something's wrong. Focus more on other relationships. Which leads me to thing four. You had 8 months to build relationships - they can be put on slow-mo for a few months while you develop other relationships. I'm really excited for when the high schools are done because then I have more people to reconnect with. Oh and take pictures! Document your epic summer to show people when you get back to school. And the final thing is make plans for next year. Just get excited.
Yes, this transition has been hard. Yes, I've had days where all I want to do is sleep and watch movies and cry. But there are beginning to be more days where I can't wait to see my friends at work, learn new things, or start a new project. It's simply a change and this one - summer - is a good change. Soak up the sun. Enjoy life.
Peace!
-Nicole
Steps:
1. Move everything back into place - make it like it was before or even improve. Make sure everything that you don't want in your room at home is stored away from view. Make yourself as comfortable as possible in your space at home.
2. Find a job or at least something to keep you busy.
3. Talk to your friends from college about the transition - tell them it's hard if it is. Just be honest. But find a balance of when to talk and what to talk about.
4. Reconnect or make new connections with friends.
5. Don't be afraid to make plans for the next year.
Ah, summer. It's a wonderful time. Right now, it's about 90 degrees out and sunny as ever. I'm excited that I can finally wear tank tops and shorts and go barefoot outside, but lately, I've been a bit down. The transition back home has been rough for me, as for many of the other writers here and many of my other friends. I've spent some nights crying, some days unwilling to get out of bed, and other days are full of energy and joy.
We spend about 8 or 9 months away from home, determining how we should live our day to day lives, having a life that our parents have no idea what it consists of, unless we tell them. I flourished while in college (read previous posts for evidence). I became closer to people than I ever have and spent nearly every moment of my life in contact with someone. Now that it's summer, it's yet another change. My best friend from high school now lives in another state and my friends who are still in high school are, well, still in high school. It was easy while classes were still session to hang out with people because they were only two steps away in their own dorm room.
In the past few weeks since classes have finished, I've discovered a few things. First, I miss a lot of people and miss them more than I have missed people before. They became a part of me and it really does feel like I've lost part of myself. Second, it's hard to find a balance of communication with people. Not only the frequency, but what we talk about. And third, time alone is hard. It just is.
So here are some solutions I hope will work. First, be comfortable. I still have some of my dorm stuff sitting in my living room (my microwave, a shelving unit, etc). And because I'm in my living room a lot, it just reminds me of people and events and such. The more stuff I put away, the easier it is to enjoy my summer. Second, keep busy. I started my job about a week and a half ago and it makes me tired as ever and keeps me busy. I don't really have time to miss people. Third, talk to people about how you're doing. And it's ok to tell them you miss them. I've found that chances are, they miss you too. But don't just talk about that - talk about what you did that day and such. Also, find a balance of communication. If you are staying up or delaying an activity to wait for them to respond, something's wrong. Focus more on other relationships. Which leads me to thing four. You had 8 months to build relationships - they can be put on slow-mo for a few months while you develop other relationships. I'm really excited for when the high schools are done because then I have more people to reconnect with. Oh and take pictures! Document your epic summer to show people when you get back to school. And the final thing is make plans for next year. Just get excited.
Yes, this transition has been hard. Yes, I've had days where all I want to do is sleep and watch movies and cry. But there are beginning to be more days where I can't wait to see my friends at work, learn new things, or start a new project. It's simply a change and this one - summer - is a good change. Soak up the sun. Enjoy life.
Peace!
-Nicole
Saturday, May 5, 2012
Note: Wrap Up
First off, too wrap up this blog's "first year at college", here are some statistics.
Most common tag: Friends
Total posts: 107
Most viewed post: Note: Glances with 66 views
Best month: October with 1,009 views
Total views: 5,562 (as of right now)
Oh and we have 235 views from people in Russia (2nd next to the US)
This summer, all of here on Dorm Room 718 will be taking a break. There will be occasional posts, but it won't be on a regular schedule. Us writers will be brainstorming some ideas on what will come next for the blog during our sophomore year that will be revealed just before we start school again in the fall. But until then, enjoy our other blogs (plus a few I enjoy reading):
My Epic Life: Megan's other blog
Musings of a Poetess: My poetry blog
Undefined: My friend Meg's blog (she wrote the article on the blog for our school's newspaper)
Bound South: A classmate from high school is just finishing up his bike tour across all of the Americas
Late Nights, Street Lights: My friend Andrew's blog
Sleeping with the Sunrise: My friend Geneva's blog
The Zenith Perspective: My friend Blake's photo blog
Enjoy reading and enjoy summer and enjoy life.
Peace!
Until next time,
Nicole
Freshman Year
1. It's been amazing.
Well, it's done. Freshman year is completed and summer has officially begun. It's been a bit emotional but I honestly could not have asked for more. I wrote a few letters to friends before they left and nearly every single one of them said something along the lines of "This year has been the weirdest, moodiest, and craziest year yet, but it's definitely been the best." And I think everyone agrees (see Megan's post here and on her personal blog and my friend Meg's post). When I started this year, I didn't expect it to go the way it did. Of course, the way it turned out isn't terrible or bad in the least bit - it has been the best. I became someone I didn't know was inside of me. I created relationships that are deeper than I could ever imagine (or anyone could imagine I think). I tried things I would have never dared to do. Now, looking back at it, I honestly could have not asked for more.
I would do a sappy post with a ton of pictures and emotional-ridden stories, but I feel like this whole blog is just that. The only thing I can say is...
Thanks for reading. It's been wonderful. And there will only be more shenanigans to come.
Until next time,
Nicole
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
How Do You Measure?
1. Speak up.
2. Migraines aren't fun.
3. Don't take lofts down by yourself, but if you do, you're gonna have some epic bruises.
4. Take time to reflect on the times life has been good to you.
Oh my gosh! Megan here... It's the last Wednesday of the year, so you'll probably be hearing a lot less from me. I'll post some over summer, but I think we're going off the usual schedule.
This week has been so strange. I've been emotional almost the entire week, and can't seem to get over the fact that freshman year is almost over. I'm taking a break from studying as I have 2 exams on Friday that I'm a little nervous about. When you mix the stress of finals with packing and having to understand that you won't see the people you've lived with, laughed with, studied with, cried with, learned with, for the next four months... It feels a little overwhelming. I go into my emotions a little bit more on my other blog.
I think it goes without saying that I've been doing way too much reflecting and thinking and feeling this past week about the year and the future... It was inevitable. I just feel so rushed with finals that there's little time to relax, have fun, and celebrate the year.
You know, the first movie night of many in my dorm was when Melissa and Nicole came over and we watched Rent--since I had never seen it before. I think Nicole and I stayed up late and woke up early just talking about anything and everything. It's kind of my first really happy, really groundbreaking memory of college that let me know this year was going to be something special. Since then, I've listened to the Rent soundtrack way too many times, especially over Christmas break. I almost have all of "La Vie Boheme" memorized I think, but the song that really gets to me is "Seasons of Love." It gets me--and Sally--every time. The song pretty much asks the question, "How do you measure a year?" So... here are some ways in which I will measure my freshman year in college, all with the fondest of memories:
2. Migraines aren't fun.
3. Don't take lofts down by yourself, but if you do, you're gonna have some epic bruises.
4. Take time to reflect on the times life has been good to you.
Oh my gosh! Megan here... It's the last Wednesday of the year, so you'll probably be hearing a lot less from me. I'll post some over summer, but I think we're going off the usual schedule.
This week has been so strange. I've been emotional almost the entire week, and can't seem to get over the fact that freshman year is almost over. I'm taking a break from studying as I have 2 exams on Friday that I'm a little nervous about. When you mix the stress of finals with packing and having to understand that you won't see the people you've lived with, laughed with, studied with, cried with, learned with, for the next four months... It feels a little overwhelming. I go into my emotions a little bit more on my other blog.
I think it goes without saying that I've been doing way too much reflecting and thinking and feeling this past week about the year and the future... It was inevitable. I just feel so rushed with finals that there's little time to relax, have fun, and celebrate the year.
You know, the first movie night of many in my dorm was when Melissa and Nicole came over and we watched Rent--since I had never seen it before. I think Nicole and I stayed up late and woke up early just talking about anything and everything. It's kind of my first really happy, really groundbreaking memory of college that let me know this year was going to be something special. Since then, I've listened to the Rent soundtrack way too many times, especially over Christmas break. I almost have all of "La Vie Boheme" memorized I think, but the song that really gets to me is "Seasons of Love." It gets me--and Sally--every time. The song pretty much asks the question, "How do you measure a year?" So... here are some ways in which I will measure my freshman year in college, all with the fondest of memories:
Tumblr posts
Facebook statuses
Dollars spent
Facebook events attended
Miles traveled
Ticket stubs
Movies watched
Cups of tea
Blog posts
Papers written
Hugs
Stories told
Times I laughed 'til I cried
Letters written
Text messages sent
Hours I should have been sleeping
Hours spent talking
Exams taken
Loads of laundry done
New facebook friends
Phone calls home
Photos taken
Meals in DS
Times I’ve redyed my hair
Times I wanted to cry
Times I felt overwhelmed
Times I felt loved
And last but not least, times I realized that I was where I was meant to be.
It has been such a wonderful year, and while it was honestly the most stressful and difficult I've had, it's also been the greatest. Nicole thinks this post is cheesy. I say it's nostalgic.
All of my love,
-Megan
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Farewell For Now
1. Taking a loft bed down is quite the undertaking.
2. Have tall people help out when taking the loft down.
3. Puppies are great therapy.
4. Saying good-bye is tough.
Well, here it is. The last week of school: one more day of classes, one study day, and then three days of finals. Then by next Monday, the campus will be empty and everyone will be back home. It's sort of crazy to think of (and I'll post about that later).
This morning, Megan and I headed to church, like we usually do. It was a normal Sunday for me, but for Megan it was a different Sunday: it was her last day at church for a few months. Since she has come with me to church nearly every Sunday, she's become a 'regular' at my church and she has made connections with people outside of me. Today, Megan had to say good-bye to new friends that she won't probably see for a few months.
With this week and this year coming to a close, I'm discovering I'm going to have to say some good-byes. Good-byes are always hard, even if you are going to see them in the near future. It's even harder if you know you won't see them for quite a long while or even ever. It's tough to know that the relationship will change and the next time you see them, you may never have the same relationship as before.
But good-byes aren't all bad. Good-bye allows you to change; it allows you to grow more and beyond. Saying good-bye to a friend for a while gives you the ok to move on. Although it's painful, sometimes it's just the point in your life that requires a few farewells and for some new adventure to come along and give you something different.
So although I'm going to be saying goodbye for only a few months, I'm still giving myself and others the OK to move beyond - to grow apart, discover new things about ourselves then come back in the fall and be able to show off what we've found out about ourselves and the world around us. Then, once we've shared, a whole new adventure can begin together - we will be forever growing.
Peace!
-Nicole
2. Have tall people help out when taking the loft down.
3. Puppies are great therapy.
4. Saying good-bye is tough.
Well, here it is. The last week of school: one more day of classes, one study day, and then three days of finals. Then by next Monday, the campus will be empty and everyone will be back home. It's sort of crazy to think of (and I'll post about that later).
This morning, Megan and I headed to church, like we usually do. It was a normal Sunday for me, but for Megan it was a different Sunday: it was her last day at church for a few months. Since she has come with me to church nearly every Sunday, she's become a 'regular' at my church and she has made connections with people outside of me. Today, Megan had to say good-bye to new friends that she won't probably see for a few months.
With this week and this year coming to a close, I'm discovering I'm going to have to say some good-byes. Good-byes are always hard, even if you are going to see them in the near future. It's even harder if you know you won't see them for quite a long while or even ever. It's tough to know that the relationship will change and the next time you see them, you may never have the same relationship as before.
But good-byes aren't all bad. Good-bye allows you to change; it allows you to grow more and beyond. Saying good-bye to a friend for a while gives you the ok to move on. Although it's painful, sometimes it's just the point in your life that requires a few farewells and for some new adventure to come along and give you something different.
So although I'm going to be saying goodbye for only a few months, I'm still giving myself and others the OK to move beyond - to grow apart, discover new things about ourselves then come back in the fall and be able to show off what we've found out about ourselves and the world around us. Then, once we've shared, a whole new adventure can begin together - we will be forever growing.
Peace!
-Nicole
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Stigma
1. Sometimes research is depressing.
2. Always remember that professors are people too.
3. Take a nap.
4. You have more control than you think.
Megan here. It's the week before finals and we're all freaking out a little bit. Life is crazy.
I grumble a lot about some of my classes, my sociology class in particular as of late. It's just been a pain in my side and it shows no signs of slowing down. I have two papers due on Monday... The thing is my professor can be a bit insensitive and well... a typical male. His big thing is basketball, but for all I have against the guy, he really says some insightful things when he gets on a rant. They just tend to stick in my head for a little while as I go on with the rest of my day.
Today we talked about deviance and stigmas, sanctions, norms, etc... What is deviant in society is set by those in power. The only problem is that we're often the ones with that power. We enforce the social norms by inflicting sanctions on those we label as deviant--even if that deviance isn't hurting anyone or anything. My professor made the comment, "We have to remember that society lives in our heads."
I'm not quite sure what was so earth shattering about that, I mean, I guess I'm not too deviant, or wouldn't be marked as such by society. Sure, my blue hair was a bit of a shock to my grandparents, but they got over it I think. It's just that sometimes we listen too much to the influences around us and maybe lose sight of who we are, or who we felt we were.
There's this concept of labeling theory that says that once you label someone as something, they begin to see themselves as fitting that label. If you label someone as a criminal, they feel that's the only label that fits and essentially they go along with it and play the part. I'm just thinking about my own life in which I was fine in one area, happy as being one thing, until that one thing was rejected by those I trusted most. Maybe it's natural to enforce or fight for what we feel as normal, a result of subconscious action even, but when that subconscious action interferes with individuality, that's when we need to reexamine what we value as a society.
Don't let society live in your head, at least don't let it smother what makes you you and what makes you happy. Fight back, and resist the pressure and temptation to fit into certain groups or certain circles. Do what makes you happy, as long as you're not causing harm or detriment to someone else. You really do have more control than you think, and maybe if we all put forth a little effort to resist useless societal sanctions and norms, we'll start seeing some positive changes.
Be safe, be well, be happy. All my love,
-Megan
2. Always remember that professors are people too.
3. Take a nap.
4. You have more control than you think.
Megan here. It's the week before finals and we're all freaking out a little bit. Life is crazy.
I grumble a lot about some of my classes, my sociology class in particular as of late. It's just been a pain in my side and it shows no signs of slowing down. I have two papers due on Monday... The thing is my professor can be a bit insensitive and well... a typical male. His big thing is basketball, but for all I have against the guy, he really says some insightful things when he gets on a rant. They just tend to stick in my head for a little while as I go on with the rest of my day.
Today we talked about deviance and stigmas, sanctions, norms, etc... What is deviant in society is set by those in power. The only problem is that we're often the ones with that power. We enforce the social norms by inflicting sanctions on those we label as deviant--even if that deviance isn't hurting anyone or anything. My professor made the comment, "We have to remember that society lives in our heads."
I'm not quite sure what was so earth shattering about that, I mean, I guess I'm not too deviant, or wouldn't be marked as such by society. Sure, my blue hair was a bit of a shock to my grandparents, but they got over it I think. It's just that sometimes we listen too much to the influences around us and maybe lose sight of who we are, or who we felt we were.
There's this concept of labeling theory that says that once you label someone as something, they begin to see themselves as fitting that label. If you label someone as a criminal, they feel that's the only label that fits and essentially they go along with it and play the part. I'm just thinking about my own life in which I was fine in one area, happy as being one thing, until that one thing was rejected by those I trusted most. Maybe it's natural to enforce or fight for what we feel as normal, a result of subconscious action even, but when that subconscious action interferes with individuality, that's when we need to reexamine what we value as a society.
Don't let society live in your head, at least don't let it smother what makes you you and what makes you happy. Fight back, and resist the pressure and temptation to fit into certain groups or certain circles. Do what makes you happy, as long as you're not causing harm or detriment to someone else. You really do have more control than you think, and maybe if we all put forth a little effort to resist useless societal sanctions and norms, we'll start seeing some positive changes.
Be safe, be well, be happy. All my love,
-Megan
Monday, April 23, 2012
Note: Finishing Up
As the year finishes up, I'm compiling some statistics along with some favorites of the readers...which is where I need you!
Here is what I would like to know!
1. Favorite post of each writer (Nicole, Megan, Melissa)
2. Favorite lesson
Just leave a comment and you'll see the results sometime next week.
Peace!
-Nicole
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