Do you ever have the feeling you are being watched? I seem to be getting that feeling more often now. But more than being watched, I seem to be watching (and sometimes staring at) people. I am constantly intrigued by people. I often can't believe that they would choose to talk to me, sit next to me, or even be in the same room as me. It isn't that I am not deserving of being talked to or looked at, it is that they are just so amazing. Just amazing that I can't help but stare at them in utter awe.
I didn't have much of an opportunity to do so in high school. I did go to school with some pretty funky people but I had also known them for so long that nothing was new to me or awe-inspiring. Plus some people didn't even want to be there, so it put a damper on things.
So here I am, at a college some would die to go to. I have met people who are like-minded and who I can connect to without much effort, which has never really happened. Or if it did, the people didn't want to give me the time of day. It is like the feeling you had when you were younger: you wanted to be friends with that certain person, but they thought you were weird so they ran away. But here, I am suddenly someone to get to know. And it's cool.
I am also finding myself looking for reactions. Again, in high school, people reacted differently to situations than I did. It was a very rare thing to find someone who reacted to a situation in about the same way as I did. So I am looking for reactions. I am still wary of how this will all work out and if I will be suddenly outcasted (which I know logically I won't be).
So next time you catch me staring at you, it's not because I am creepy, but it is because I am looking at you in awe and waiting for your reaction.
Hope you enjoyed my little note.
Peace!
-Nicole
No comments:
Post a Comment