Opening Night (and 100th Post!)

1. Stage make-up is really not good for your face.
2. Group projects are more work than you would expect.
3. If you wander around Target for an hour at 9am, the employees start to give you odd looks.
4. Try less to impress...and just be yourself.

It's opening night for the play I have been working on for a few weeks. It's an odd feeling, for sure. This is my first college production I am performing in and the first show I will see costume pieces I help create up on stage. This will also be the first time my sister Ashly will see me perform. I'm super excited, but also very glad it's coming to an end. It's been stressful and a lot of time has been put in. But overall, I'm very glad I did it (despite the fact I complained nearly the whole way through).

Last night was our final dress rehearsal, which means afterwards, we went to Gio's, a local pizzeria. When I was on technical crew for Grease earlier on in the season, my experience at Gio's was not the greatest. Although this might just be cognitive dissonance, I believe it was because it was a brand-new experience where everyone was an adult and able to make choices for themselves. I was sort of in shock and I left pretty early. I also had some emotions come up that I didn't expect to appear. The tradition the theatre has is presenting a "Bucky" award to 2 freshman (1 performer and 1 techie). I knew for Grease I wouldn't get it because I had only put in a bit of effort and time compared to other freshmen techies. It deservingly went to my friend Hannah, who I have known since we were in 7th grade. These emotions of jealously and a bit of frustration and anger appeared. I knew it was ridiculous to feel such things, so I worked through them and came to the decision to not worry about getting a Bucky. Sure, I wanted it, but there are plenty of theatre students who didn't get a Bucky and still do well.

Up until I arrived at Gio's, I had truly forgotten about it. I pushed the thought aside and tried to enjoy myself. Then the moment came: the presentation of the Bucky. The performer Bucky went to my friend John, which is well deserved. Because I am mainly a performer, I thought my chance had passed. But then, my name was called out.

It was unexpected and wonderful, although I do think others were as deserving as I was. The Bucky is voted on by the upperclassmen. Which meant I had somehow made an impact on them and that is pretty epic. I definitely learned something: don't worry about it. It seems that when we forget the prize or the desired award, we try less to impress and become more of ourselves. I completely forgot about the Bucky, which I wanted quite a bit, and I just lived as myself.

Peace!

-Nicole

PS. This is the 100th post!!!! Yay!