Fairy Dust

1. Finding an on-campus job is difficult.

2. Don't leave 8-10 page papers to the last minute.

3. Christmas gifts are hard to think of.

4. Think happy thoughts and the fairy dust will do the rest.

A lot has gone wrong in the past two days. First off, I procrastinated a 8-10 page paper until last night and it wasn't simply a analytical paper; it was a research paper on the use and effectiveness of meditation in anxiety treatment. I had all of my research done, but I had to paraphrase, use, and weave together 14 sources eloquently. I didn't really start the paper until about 8pm last night and I didn't finish it until 2:30am. Then I had to get up at 6:45.

Second, I spilled tea all over my desk. I save my computer, but my case now smells like mint tea.

Third,  I opened my email inbox yesterday and there, waiting for me to read, was an email telling me if I got an on-campus job. I read it and turns out I didn't get it. This is the third for fourth job I applied to and didn't get. I felt so defeated and quite angry that I still didn't have a job. I'm mean, come on! I am a hard worker and I am super organized and quite personal.

Fourth, because it's Christmas concert season and the semester is coming to a close, every single one of my friends has a different schedule from each other...so we haven't seen much of each other. Although I see them nearly every day, I still miss the contact I get.

A lot has gone wrong. But, then again, a lot has gone right. I got a Subway gift card in the mail from a foundation that gave me a scholarship, I got a washing machine right away tonight, I got to wear my costume for the first time for the 10 minute scene I'm in, and one of my good friends from high school who I haven't seen since mid-summer might be coming to stay with me for a few days.

We tend to focus on the terrible things of a day. Bad energy, like all energy, is contagious. And bad energy requires less of us - it's easy to succumb to. If we let the bad things get us down, we tend to stay down because, well, sometimes it's easier to complain than it is to smile.

But smiling isn't all that hard. "You just think happy thoughts. They lift you into the air," as said by Wendy in Peter Pan. Good energy breeds good energy. It picks you up off your feet and gives you a little nudge to keep on going.

So don't let bad thoughts bring you down because then you can't fly. And who doesn't want to do that?

Peace!

-Nicole

Defy Gravity

Note from Nicole: Yes, we do seem to like the musical Wicked. It's a good theme to go with.

Melissa here. This is my first official blog post on here, so bear with me. I'm gonna post random stuff, and then elaborate on it all. Make sense? I hope so.

1. Study breaks are good. You know it's gone bad when you start reading words for other words that aren't that word... yeah.

Studying is not a good time. But, when you misread a word for a different word and tell your friends about it, it can be quite the amusing time. Let's just say I'm special. Also, sunflower seeds for me make EVERYTHING better. Especially studying.

2. Friends are awesome.

The friends I've made here are wonderful, and I feel so lucky to have found them. With me is one of my friends from high school, and I'm so glad I have her here with me. She's my safety blanket, and I'd be lost without her. I've managed to make new friends, too, and each and everyone one of them is amazing in their own way. I've managed to meet my twin (HI, NICOLE!), fellow Gleeks, Potterheads, Starkids, choir nerds, etc. It's kinda blowing my mind how awesome people are. I'm so excited to make some life-long friendships with some truly awesome people.

3. Sometimes, it's okay to be in a total state of confusion.

Finishing up my third week of classes, I've come to realize that they're not what I expected them to be, and I'm completely okay with that. My freshman inquiry seminar is called "gendered performance." It makes my brain hurt, it makes me totally confused, and it makes me question everything I know (or thought I knew) about gender, and I LOVE IT. I want to learn more, I want to know about all the different theories, and I want to hear other points of view. It's one of the first times that I really, really, REALLY want to learn. And it's a fabulous feeling. I'm actually excited to write my paper for this class, and it's one of the few times I've felt like this. It's wonderful.

4. Defy gravity.

Last week I was really struggling. I was constantly in a state of unhappiness, and I couldn't figure out exactly why. I just felt numb. I'm not sure how exactly I got myself out of the shlump (probably the amazing friends I talked about earlier), but now I don't want to let myself get back there. I've struggled with bouts of depression all throughout high school, and I want college to be that turning point. The time where I be myself, and I'm happy with myself, and I don't let anything stop me. In high school, I was sometimes afraid to just be myself and not worry about what others thought. I always thought I wasn't good enough, I was hard on myself, and at times, I was my own worst enemy. Now that I'm in college where no one knows who I am, was, or want to be, it's like a fresh slate has been handed to me, and I can do whatever I want. And that's exactly what I'm going to do, and it makes me so excited. It'll be difficult at times, but it's a new opportunity. Life is full of these opportunities and I have finally taken it.

It's my time to defy gravity. (I'm so cliché and cheesy. It doesn't help that "Defying Gravity" is the song Nicole and I will hopefully be singing for the freshman showcase, and the song is stuck in my head).

Yay for being cheesy. It's what I do best. That, and being awkward...

Aww yeah.

-Melissa

For Good

1. Not having class until 1:20 is pretty awesome.
2. Wear a jacket, even if you think you'll be warm enough.
3.  Libraries are not such productive places when you are on FB.
4. I have been changed for good.


"Who can say if I've been changed for the better? / But because I knew you / I have been changed for good." - For Good from Wicked

It's been three weeks since I started classes. Three weeks. I don't even know what to think about it. Three weeks ago, I went to class and had my first class of college. Three weeks ago, I met my 'twin' and became closer to everyone around me. Two weeks ago I met someone who changed my life for good. I have had classes already cancelled, started to learn to play guitar, impromptu concerts held in my dorm room, spent too many nights staying up late, and have grown so much in who I am.

Life is a game of imitation. When we are little, we copy our parents and siblings. When we are older and growing into our teen years, we idolize celebrities and mimic what they are doing. When we start middle school and high school, we will do anything to get attention, so we start to 'follow the crowd'. Most of this is not intentional; it is just how we function as humans. We are still individuals; we were born who we are. But we aren't a hard, glazed pot. We are soft clay and different textures, colors, and shapes are put into us; finger prints are left. Life is process, not point A and point B.

We also start to learn little quirks from others around us. Take swearing for an extreme example. When we are thrown into a group that is using profanity left and right, we tend to start to pick up on that habit. It's the same with pretty much everything else. I have begun to notice my new friends' sayings pop up in conversations I have with others. I am noticing some of my mannerisms are a carbon copy of my friends'. And it is happening the other way around too. My little quirks are appearing in my friends and my random saying are becoming a part of the vernacular.

I am not a different person from when I moved into college; I just have a few more colors on my 'vase of life' and a few more finger prints have been created.

And it has only been three weeks. What is my vase going to look like once I am three months, one year, three years into college? I guess we will just have to wait and see.

Peace!

-Nicole