Preschool

It has been said many times before, but I am coming to a new understanding of what it means when someone says college students are preschoolers. Of course, I get excited when I learn something new and I think it is the coolest thing ever and sometimes I need my mom to pick me up and kiss me on the head. But let me add something to this extended metaphor: preschoolers develop a thing called "false beliefs", which is the understanding that what someone thinks can be wrong, including their own thoughts.

In the past few weeks, I have been struggling with how to deal with differing opinions. When growing up, views on things that other people held were different, but not drastically. And if they were, it always seemed I could prove them wrong. It seemed I was always right. I have come to the difficult realization that my views on things may be wrong and there can be multiple truths on something. Just as preschoolers develop the ability to control their emotions, I am learning how to control my feelings when someone has a dissenting opinion, especially when someone is close to me.

There is something unique to college-age students though that differs from preschoolers - the development of being able to appreciate differing thoughts and see them as valuable. My college emphasizes the importance of interfaith and inter-anything conversation. The valuing of opinion is what makes something change for the better. And I'm slowly getting to that understanding of that value.

And although preschoolers and adults are different, I think I am still entitled to a few naps and for my mom to pick me up off the sidewalk and kiss my scrape and tell me it's all going to be ok.

Peace!

-Nicole

Growing Pains

It's been a month since I've been back on campus. I have reorganized my room more than once, freaked out about grades a few times, and have had a few very busy days. I didn't realize it had only been a month until tonight, when I was adding a ton of events to my calendar on my computer. It seems more time than a month has passed - a lot has happened and it seems to be painful at times.

I used to have terrible growing pains when I was younger. My legs would throb and would be sensitive to touch. I never really understood why I had them - I wasn't too active and they would happen at the weirdest times, like in the middle of church or art class. To my 8-year-old self, it was a pain that was bothersome and I really didn't see the point of all that pain.

Of course now, I understand the purpose of growing pains.* A growing body means the body is changing and new things are about to happen. The outcome will always be positive - a body that is stronger and bigger than before. But until then, the growing may be painful. The past few weeks back on campus have been that way - a bit painful. I thought that once I was back on campus, this would just pick up where I left off. But I am finding that that isn't true. My friends, most of whom lived on the same floor as I did, are now scattered across campus and everyone is involved in different things. All in all, it has been difficult to stay connected.

It's been a growing pain. I'm learning that keeping connections with friends will be a continuing process and even more so, making new friends is more difficult than it was last year. It's not that I don't want to meet others, it's just difficult to get out of my comfort zone. I know that growing pains are necessary, but as many a parent will say, massaging the legs helps with the pain. What I need to do is stretch myself a bit more - stretch out my hand to meet someone new, help out an organization, and stretch myself to explore things I may have never thought of before.

Although growing pains are bothersome and complaining may help for an 8-year-old, I think it's high time for me to stretch myself up and out of what I know - there is so much more out there I have yet to learn about. My world I have created of a small group of friends can't last forever - it needs to grow, change, possibly be flipped on its head. There needs to be more of me, a big, greater, better me and isn't that the point of growing pains?

Peace!

-Nicole

*Although scientifically, growing pains are not connected to rapid, sudden growth, but for the purposes of this post, I'll just stick with the common understanding.

All Dogs go to Heaven

"Happiness is a warm puppy." -Charles Schulz

Greetings from Megan.  I hope your Monday was as mellow as mine.

Today is World Suicide Prevention Day and this week is National Suicide Prevention Week and I had a huge post planned for tonight, until I realized while walking back to my dorm that it's also been exactly one year since I'd lost my dog.  World Suicide Prevention Day is hugely important to me and expect that to be the topic of my post next Monday, but for now, I just want to talk about my dog.

I think the value of a pet is vastly underestimated by people who have never had one. Pepper, my Miniature Schnauzer, bopped into my life two days before my 7th birthday and departed twelve days after I had arrived at college.  Undoubtedly those 12 years contained some of the roughest experiences I've ever undergone, and I cannot count the number of nights I spent crying into her neck. If she wasn't sleeping on my brother's bed, she was sleeping on the pillow next to me. She was, quite frankly, the best friend I'd ever had, and so leaving to go to school when I knew chances were good that I would never see her again was really, really tough.

I can chuckle at it now, but when I found out she had passed away I was bawling in my dorm room, only I was trying not to since I didn't want to freak out my roommate. I don't know exactly why I did, but I told Nicole as soon as I found out--we were on Facebook chat at the time. We had known each other for a grand total of three days, and she promptly asked me if I was okay and then offered me cookies.  I probably shouldn't have put her in such an awkward position.

Pets have ways of teaching us life lessons, lessons about death and what it means to take life as it comes, to love unconditionally, and to handle suffering with grace and dignity.  A wonder that they do this all without speaking a single word.  Pepper made me appreciate life so much and she got me through my most difficult days.  Of course I wish she was still with me.  Who wouldn't want that?  But she left at a time when I knew I was moving on and going to be perfectly okay.  She did her job and believe me, she did it well.  Pets, especially dogs, are just like that I guess.  They not only provide a source of unconditional love, but they give us something to love and care for. I know it sounds crazy, but I can't believe how much I love and have bonded with our baby Betta fish, Cuddles.

If you have a pet, take a moment to be affectionate.  If you have had a pet but don't right now, remember some of the fond moments. Finally, if you don't have a pet, I recommend getting one in the future.

With all my love,

Megan

Pepper

Releasing my Inner Child

1. Cut people some slack.  No one's perfect.
2. Keep some hummus around.
3. Some people don't like hugs, and that's okay.
4. It's okay to sleep with a teddy bear.

It's Megan.  Hope your week is going smoothly. At least it's almost the weekend right?

Woah.  I turn 20 in less than three months and I am TOTALLY freaking out about it.  It isn't so much added responsibility or massive lifestyle change as it is the number itself. 20.  That zero and absence of a one in the ten's place is just way too freaky.  At least agree with me that it's a really intimidating number.

I feel like a little kid again, just because I feel like I've regressed to a much younger state of mind.  College changes you to be more mature, but also more immature--not in bad ways, but just ways that remind you of when you were a little kid.

For example:
I get really excited over mac and cheese, french toast sticks, and hot cocoa.
I go nuts for candy and cartoons.
Hugs make everything better.
I lapse into random goofy spells
and...
I slept with a teddy bear.

You don't understand!  I slept with a teddy bear over break, not because I had to or because one was just there, but because I wanted to and it made me feel better.  I never slept with stuffed animals when I was a child, not because I didn't have any, but because I just didn't like to sleep with them.  I really didn't see the appeal at all.  In my defense, I slept with my dog a lot--but that's more like a living stuffed animal that gets really warm, starts panting, and then moves to another corner of the bed because she wants nothing to do with you...  I'm just surprised at how comforting a teddy bear can be, even at my age.

I don't know if this whole regression thing is a product of college or not, but I don't see it as bad, things like being goofy don't hurt anyone or anything. If anything, I'm staying young at heart right?  We all adore elderly folks who know how to have a good time or who can understand the mindset of a child and so maybe that's what I'm doing.  Heck, I hope I'm still breaking into random accents when I'm 85.  I will embarrass my grandkids SO much!

This year has allowed me to grow leaps and bounds as a person, both through personal insights and education.  I think it's okay for me (and all of us) to be able to laugh and access our inner children as well.

Peace, love, hugs, and high fives

-Megan