First person to comment and tell me the name of the song I got the title from gets a mental high five from me. My friend and I used to go through this song, sending each other the lyrics line by line. Oy, nostalgia.
First things first, if you're reading this, you need to look at the post before this and share it on your facebook, tumblr, twitter, whatever social networks you're involved in. Nicole has entered a scholarship competition for bloggers and needs as many 'shares' as possible. Please do this. Besides, it has some good political insight.
1. Walks help with back problems.
2. This too shall pass.
3. Get out of the house and get out of your head.
4. Have faith in friendships.
Hey, Megan here. I hope everyone is having an excellent holiday season filled with family, friends, and baked goods.
I've been home for 11 days now, and while it is nice to feel carpet beneath my feet, have a nice shower, and be able to walk to the fridge for a snack, I still miss college immensely. The truth is I have cooped myself up in my room for far too many days and am a little bit stuck in my head. Last night I went out with friends to our popular summer haunt and it made me realize not only the importance of getting out of the house, but also the importance of simply having faith in your friends. You have to trust that each other will still be the same person you know and love. Everyone changes to come extent, but, as I learned in my most recent psych class, personality is fairly constant over time, so have faith in it.
It's important to get out of your room, get out of your head, get out of your house, go spend some time in a dimly lit coffee shop, and have a good discussion in a van. Don't get stuck in your head. It's not an accurate portrayal of reality; it's just a skewed mess of constructs that can certainly and very convincingly masquerade as reality, but it really isn't. See, the trick is you actually have to go and live in the real world with real people in order to construct a more accurate reality instead of just letting your imagination take what you know and run off in all sorts of directions with it. It's so simple, yet we forget it sometimes.
So tonight I'm spending some quality time with a couple of friends who I've known since 7th grade. It's definitely time for a reunion, and I know we'll be able to pick up on our friendship right where we left off despite the fact that we've all changed quite a bit. I'm excited to spend time with them because I get to be the part of me I missed.
We all play different roles in different groups of friends or acquaintances, and I get to be wild and bubbly and silly with this particular group, whereas I sometimes like to fade into the background in other groups. Sometimes I step a little out of line and play a role I'm not meant to when I'm with certain people. Believe me, it is an uncomfortable feeling to sit there and think to yourself, "I shouldn't have said that, definitely shouldn't have done that, should have thought before I said THAT." It's okay to play different roles I think, it just depends on who other people need you to be, and what you're comfortable with. Taking on a different role doesn't mean you change your personality either, it just dictates what strengths and weaknesses you employ and when. I think it's just important to change it up a bit, and not force yourself into being typecasted as it were. Is typecasted a word?
In conclusion, get out and live a little, have faith that you'll be able to pick up where your friendships left off, and just let yourself adapt to situations. When you leave home such as I have, it's rough to go back... but, it's important to. (Let the record show that I have now expressed this sentiment in writing whenever I complain.) When you hit the road and leave, it's almost as if you have also taken upon yourself the responsibility of returning, almost like a price you have to pay for the extra freedom. It's just the way it is sometimes. Making yourself remember where you've come from isn't a bad thing by any means, and in some ways it keeps you grounded, and gives you extra motivation to get where you want to be.
So, I hope you have a most excellent week. Take care. Love and hugs.
-Megan
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Sunday, December 25, 2011
CHRISTMAS!!!
Melissa here.
I HAVEN'T BLOGGED IN FOREVER. HI, EVERYONE.
Right now, it's officially Christmas day (even though it's almost 2 am, it still counts)!
I'm really excited, because I get to spend a lot of time with my family. I've realized over this break that I've really missed them. Today, I spent the entire day with them. We ate lunch together, then went to Christmas Eve mass, and came home to open presents. I'm really excited, because I got three books (two of which I've already read, but who's to say I can't reread them again?), one of which is Looking For Alaska by John Greene. I've wanted to read it for over a year, and now I finally can! I also got the game 'Apples To Apples', which I ended up spending a good chunk of time playing with my mom and sisters. Like I said, I've really missed them, and it took being away from home and coming back for a longer break to realize this. Being home, I've been able to have some really good talks with my mom, like we used to when I was growing up. I forgot how much I really need those talks. No one can put things into perspective for me like my mommy can. I guess what the point of this post is, don't forget the importance of family during this Christmas time. Don't forget the importance of family ever.
I guess that's all I have for now, so...
Aww yeah.
-Melissa
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Merry Christmas!
1. New PJs are glorious.
2. When watching the last Harry Potter with your mom, be prepared to stop a lot to explain things.
3. Blogging on a phone is hard, but worth it.
4. When it comes down to it, love is all we've got.
Merry Christmas all! I hope you spent your Christmas Eve with those you love.
My mom and I spent our night munching on artichoke dip, crackers, and cookies. We opened gifts (best of all are my PJs and Tangled movie) and then watched Harry Potter 7 part 2. Although I had to stop the movie multiple times to explain things to my mom, it was a great night.
My favorite line from the movie is from Dumbledore: "Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and, above all, those who live without love." Beautiful line, isn't it?
On this Christmas Eve, all I want to say is it's all about love. God came down to earth to give us a bundle of love. Even if you don't believe in God, you have to agree that the best thing for everyone is love. So just love on people. As this season ends and a new year comes upon us, maybe our focus should be on love - nothing else.
May your night be filled with love (and hopefully Santa will bring you something pretty cool).
Peace!
-Nicole
2. When watching the last Harry Potter with your mom, be prepared to stop a lot to explain things.
3. Blogging on a phone is hard, but worth it.
4. When it comes down to it, love is all we've got.
Merry Christmas all! I hope you spent your Christmas Eve with those you love.
My mom and I spent our night munching on artichoke dip, crackers, and cookies. We opened gifts (best of all are my PJs and Tangled movie) and then watched Harry Potter 7 part 2. Although I had to stop the movie multiple times to explain things to my mom, it was a great night.
My favorite line from the movie is from Dumbledore: "Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and, above all, those who live without love." Beautiful line, isn't it?
On this Christmas Eve, all I want to say is it's all about love. God came down to earth to give us a bundle of love. Even if you don't believe in God, you have to agree that the best thing for everyone is love. So just love on people. As this season ends and a new year comes upon us, maybe our focus should be on love - nothing else.
May your night be filled with love (and hopefully Santa will bring you something pretty cool).
Peace!
-Nicole
Thursday, December 22, 2011
The Story's Conflict
1. Baking cookies is exhausting.
2. A night with family is the best kind of night.
3. Write a blog post - Megan might get angry if you don't.
4. If there is no conflict, there is no story.
I am currently sitting at my kitchen table, surrounded by my family (mom, aunt Arlyce, uncle Rich, and cousin Joseph). Let me start off by saying that my uncle Rich is insanely brilliant and creative. He just got back from a script-writing conference in Hollywood. One of the main things he learned was "If a scene does not have conflict, there is no story."
My uncle, being the brilliant man he is, applied it to life. If life does not have conflict, then what is the point? Take a huge break-up. If it didn't hurt and if it didn't create some emotion, then that means there wasn't much there before.
Can you list all the fights you've had with friends? How about can you list all of the crazy things you've done in the past year? I know I can tell so many stories of fights/conflicts I've had with friends and I can tell you about the crazy antics that have happened too. Every single one of them has had a conflict involved, whether it be between myself and friends or myself vs myself.
And I've learned from each of them too. Try to remember a day where something crazy or weird or exciting didn't happen - pretty much impossible. If there is no conflict, there is no story. If there is no story, then there is no lesson. Without a lesson, then what is life? I try to learn something new every day (heck, that's why I blog). If I can't find something in my day that I can learn from, then what is the point of it?
Something can always be learned - no matter the situation. If a day seems too boring and utterly useless, create conflict. Scary, I know. But, why waste a day when posing a risky question or doing something a bit out there could create conflict and present a lesson?
Conflict also brings change. On a large scale, if a country disagrees with another, they will surely let the other know. But on a smaller scale, if something is not right in a relationship, the best thing to do is confront it and work it out. If it isn't talked about, the problem will still be there and change will never happen.
Don't be afraid of conflict. Without it, there pretty much is no life. So live, speak your mind, and learn.
Peace!
-Nicole
2. A night with family is the best kind of night.
3. Write a blog post - Megan might get angry if you don't.
4. If there is no conflict, there is no story.
I am currently sitting at my kitchen table, surrounded by my family (mom, aunt Arlyce, uncle Rich, and cousin Joseph). Let me start off by saying that my uncle Rich is insanely brilliant and creative. He just got back from a script-writing conference in Hollywood. One of the main things he learned was "If a scene does not have conflict, there is no story."
My uncle, being the brilliant man he is, applied it to life. If life does not have conflict, then what is the point? Take a huge break-up. If it didn't hurt and if it didn't create some emotion, then that means there wasn't much there before.
Can you list all the fights you've had with friends? How about can you list all of the crazy things you've done in the past year? I know I can tell so many stories of fights/conflicts I've had with friends and I can tell you about the crazy antics that have happened too. Every single one of them has had a conflict involved, whether it be between myself and friends or myself vs myself.
And I've learned from each of them too. Try to remember a day where something crazy or weird or exciting didn't happen - pretty much impossible. If there is no conflict, there is no story. If there is no story, then there is no lesson. Without a lesson, then what is life? I try to learn something new every day (heck, that's why I blog). If I can't find something in my day that I can learn from, then what is the point of it?
Something can always be learned - no matter the situation. If a day seems too boring and utterly useless, create conflict. Scary, I know. But, why waste a day when posing a risky question or doing something a bit out there could create conflict and present a lesson?
Conflict also brings change. On a large scale, if a country disagrees with another, they will surely let the other know. But on a smaller scale, if something is not right in a relationship, the best thing to do is confront it and work it out. If it isn't talked about, the problem will still be there and change will never happen.
Don't be afraid of conflict. Without it, there pretty much is no life. So live, speak your mind, and learn.
Peace!
-Nicole
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Watch Your Step
1. Have faith in your ability to recall information.
2. Technology is stressful. It's okay to disconnect.
3. 16 hours of sleep in 3 days = bad outcomes.
4. Trust your feet.
Hey, it's Megan. I won't wish you a happy Wednesday, since it's finals week for us... but I hope you're surviving at least.
So I have been completely disconnected from all social networks ever since Monday morning, courtesy of Nicole changing my passwords per my request. I am connected via email and text messaging and that's pretty much it. :P It's different, but I am enjoying not being so accessible. It's a lot less stress on me, especially with all my thought and effort focused on finals. The only reason I can rationalize being here and typing this is because I got out of a final sooner than I expected to. Oh, and I guess Melissa and I might grab lunch together :) It's okay, I have higher hopes for tomorrow's finals.
I worked at a bowling alley for much of my senior year and the summer before college. It was super icy this morning, and while I was walking on the iced over cobblestones on my way to DS, it just brought me back. I was always horrible at walking on the lanes--there was no real process to it, you just had to teach yourself how to do it without falling. My coworkers told me the only way to really be able to do it well and with a decent amount of speed was to walk confidently and trust in your feet.
Following my usual blog pattern, I think this makes a great metaphor for life. Life isn't always easy or solid, and sometimes it's downright slippery. Finals are tough to navigate, especially when you don't know what to study or for how long... or how much it will impact you. Sometimes everything feels unstable or uncertain, but even though that may be the case, it doesn't mean you'll fall, or fail for that matter. It's okay to trust in your step and trust in your feet, because when you do that, there's less freaking out and compensating. My friend and coworker always told me that we overcompensate when we're on a slippery surface which makes us even more likely to fall.
If you're stressed and freaking out over anything, whether that be an exam, a presentation, a date, or even going home for winter break, it's important to take a deep breath, reset yourself, and walk--all while trusting in your step. Well, I tried to remember what my coworkers said and I didn't slip this morning, so I guess that means I must be doing ok.
Good luck on the rest of the week, be well and stay safe.
-Megan
2. Technology is stressful. It's okay to disconnect.
3. 16 hours of sleep in 3 days = bad outcomes.
4. Trust your feet.
Hey, it's Megan. I won't wish you a happy Wednesday, since it's finals week for us... but I hope you're surviving at least.
So I have been completely disconnected from all social networks ever since Monday morning, courtesy of Nicole changing my passwords per my request. I am connected via email and text messaging and that's pretty much it. :P It's different, but I am enjoying not being so accessible. It's a lot less stress on me, especially with all my thought and effort focused on finals. The only reason I can rationalize being here and typing this is because I got out of a final sooner than I expected to. Oh, and I guess Melissa and I might grab lunch together :) It's okay, I have higher hopes for tomorrow's finals.
I worked at a bowling alley for much of my senior year and the summer before college. It was super icy this morning, and while I was walking on the iced over cobblestones on my way to DS, it just brought me back. I was always horrible at walking on the lanes--there was no real process to it, you just had to teach yourself how to do it without falling. My coworkers told me the only way to really be able to do it well and with a decent amount of speed was to walk confidently and trust in your feet.
Following my usual blog pattern, I think this makes a great metaphor for life. Life isn't always easy or solid, and sometimes it's downright slippery. Finals are tough to navigate, especially when you don't know what to study or for how long... or how much it will impact you. Sometimes everything feels unstable or uncertain, but even though that may be the case, it doesn't mean you'll fall, or fail for that matter. It's okay to trust in your step and trust in your feet, because when you do that, there's less freaking out and compensating. My friend and coworker always told me that we overcompensate when we're on a slippery surface which makes us even more likely to fall.
If you're stressed and freaking out over anything, whether that be an exam, a presentation, a date, or even going home for winter break, it's important to take a deep breath, reset yourself, and walk--all while trusting in your step. Well, I tried to remember what my coworkers said and I didn't slip this morning, so I guess that means I must be doing ok.
Good luck on the rest of the week, be well and stay safe.
-Megan
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
The Rest of the Story
1. Unplug yourself from technology during stressful times - it may increase your productivity.
2. Wear comfortable clothes during finals - you'll be happy you did.
3. Puppy love is the best.
4. The rest of the story has to be written.
Day one of finals week: Complete. Tomorrow is our last day of classes and then Wednesday-Friday are finals. It is getting to be crunch time - well, it has been crunch time for quite a while, but now everyone is feeling it. Most people can't wait for the semester to be over, but for me, it's bittersweet.
If I go back to back to August 28th, I was feeling so anxious and excited.
I had no idea what was coming but I was ok with it. I was so excited to start a new chapter in my life - heck, I waited years for that moment to come. I was as ready as I could be. I situated myself into my room and went to orientation.
I loved orientation. It prepared me for what I didn't know what I needed to be prepared for. I loved my orientation group and I would be spending the rest of the semester in class with them. This picture was taken one of the last days of orientation, little to my knowledge that this was my first college family. I love each and every one of them like a sibling and they are so dear to me.
Then life became very bizarre...which is when I started this blog. I thought I would have a strict schedule and I thought I would act just as I had before, just without as much anxiety as before. I never expected for this to happen. Every day brings something new and I mean new. I never know what to expect. Sometimes I wish for consistency, but most of the time, I love the craziness. And I've done some crazy things. Heck, Megan jokes that I now have a reputation. I am the "pink-haired, bubbly, loud, emotional, girl-with-the-ideas, theatrical, cute-clothes-wearing, Harry Potter and Doctor Who fan, touchy-feely, organized, army-building" girl. Ok, so maybe most of that stuff isn't included in my reputation, but my friends sure do know about all of it.
Good luck on finals and whatever else is going on in your life.
Peace!
2. Wear comfortable clothes during finals - you'll be happy you did.
3. Puppy love is the best.
4. The rest of the story has to be written.
Day one of finals week: Complete. Tomorrow is our last day of classes and then Wednesday-Friday are finals. It is getting to be crunch time - well, it has been crunch time for quite a while, but now everyone is feeling it. Most people can't wait for the semester to be over, but for me, it's bittersweet.
 |
| "Move-in day" me |
 |
| My club - see me in the middle, poking my head out? |
 |
| Crazy how even now it represents all of our personalities (I'm center in the back row, choking my friend) |
I've changed so much. I think of when I've gone to camp or mission trips in years past and come back suddenly and abruptly changed. It's all good, but that change often doesn't last long. It's that mountaintop experience, where you feel so emotionally high and then you back to reality and that mountaintop experience was too short to really learn from that experience. For a while, I felt like college was like that. Orientation felt like camp: everything was planned out and I was in a specific group. It felt like a mountaintop experience.
But now I have started to live on that mountaintop. And I've made friends. I became friends with Melissa who accepted me for who I was instantly and allowed me to be me fully for the first time in a long time. She introduced me to Megan, who I have become connected to at the heart. I've also met Sally, Stef, Erin, and so many other people who have started to camp with me onto of that mountain with me.
Throughout my classes, I've learned to look up, instead of looking down from my position on the mountain. Little did I know that there are other mountains to climb where I could experience more mountaintop experiences. Before, I've always been looking down to see where I've been and to see how far I've gone. I'd been waiting for college for so that I didn't remember to keep on looking farther up. There is so much more waiting for me to climb. And I'm not discouraged by it...these aren't goals set by other people; I choose what one to climb. If I don't like it, all I have to do is switch to another.
I've been living on this mountain for a while and it's become semi-comfortable. As the semester ends, I can't help but think I am ready for the semester to end. But maybe I'm not. I love how everything about college is still new to me. But as these last few weeks have passed, things are becoming not-so-new, like when to eat dinner to avoid the dinner rush, the best places to study, when to get the best shower in the bathroom, or how long it takes to walk to class.
I'm also slightly sad because I will have to home for about a month. The concept of home has completely changed in my mind. Home has always been at my house; now it's mainly my dorm. When I spent mid-sem and Thanksgiving at my house, all I wanted after a few days was to go back my dorm. My college family was there and I missed seeing them. Yes, I do miss my house and my mother, but I was ready to move out when I came to college. I'm not ready to say goodbye to my friends, even if it is only for a month.
I'm also slightly sad because I will have to home for about a month. The concept of home has completely changed in my mind. Home has always been at my house; now it's mainly my dorm. When I spent mid-sem and Thanksgiving at my house, all I wanted after a few days was to go back my dorm. My college family was there and I missed seeing them. Yes, I do miss my house and my mother, but I was ready to move out when I came to college. I'm not ready to say goodbye to my friends, even if it is only for a month.
The end of the semester doesn't mean huge changes are in store. It just means that the beginning has ended...now it's time for the rest of the story to start. And I can't wait to see what crazy things are going happen.
It's going to be quite the adventure and quite a beautiful mess.
Good luck on finals and whatever else is going on in your life.
Peace!
-Nicole
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Join the Army!
1. Baking cookies = amazing.
2. Bleach is never fun to spill.
3. Hair dye does stain skin.
4. Create an army.
I am currently sitting in my dorm's laundry room, smelling slightly of bleach... hair bleach. Soon enough, my hands will be tinted blue and my friend Erin and her friend Ashley will have a few streaks of blue in their hair (and it's supposed to be blue this time!).
My goal right now: to create an army of people with streaks of crazy color in their hair. So far, I've recruited Megan, Erin, and Ashley. I just posted this on my Facebook, "I've created a monster. Anyone else want a funky color in their hair? I'm trying to create an army. So far I have pink, purple, and blue. I want a few more colors in my army. Anyone?" And right now, I have one person coming downstairs for me to color his hair purple. And I have five people considering joining me. It's my evil plan. I'm creating an army of colors - sort of like a Rainbow Hair Army.
I am so winning.
It may be a ridiculous goal right now to create a Rainbow Hair Army, but maybe creating an army isn't such a bad idea. It is finals weeks and things are completely crazy. Megan and I today went a little crazy at dinner and nearly everyone on campus is wearing glasses, sweatpants, and sweatshirts. During a time when people are hiding in their rooms or in the library doing homework, it is sort of a lonely time. I know for the past few days, I've craved the company of others, but haven't been able to enjoy that company because either I or they have had things to do.
I've found that stress is easier to handle when you are around others - maybe not complaining all the time, but even just being in the company of others. Think of war movies: when the huge battle scene comes, every single one of the men is quiet, preparing for the first shot to be heard. Each of them are facing their own fears and demons, but they are together.
Creating an army is creating a group of people on whom you can depend on in those times of trial; a "no man left behind" culture is created. Not to mention, that during those really happy times, they are there to share it with you. Happiness grows. Lovely, isn't it?
So create an army. It will be a force against all that is bad and something that will create joy. Just don't start any wars against any people.
Peace!
-Nicole
2. Bleach is never fun to spill.
3. Hair dye does stain skin.
4. Create an army.
I am currently sitting in my dorm's laundry room, smelling slightly of bleach... hair bleach. Soon enough, my hands will be tinted blue and my friend Erin and her friend Ashley will have a few streaks of blue in their hair (and it's supposed to be blue this time!).
My goal right now: to create an army of people with streaks of crazy color in their hair. So far, I've recruited Megan, Erin, and Ashley. I just posted this on my Facebook, "I've created a monster. Anyone else want a funky color in their hair? I'm trying to create an army. So far I have pink, purple, and blue. I want a few more colors in my army. Anyone?" And right now, I have one person coming downstairs for me to color his hair purple. And I have five people considering joining me. It's my evil plan. I'm creating an army of colors - sort of like a Rainbow Hair Army.
I am so winning.
It may be a ridiculous goal right now to create a Rainbow Hair Army, but maybe creating an army isn't such a bad idea. It is finals weeks and things are completely crazy. Megan and I today went a little crazy at dinner and nearly everyone on campus is wearing glasses, sweatpants, and sweatshirts. During a time when people are hiding in their rooms or in the library doing homework, it is sort of a lonely time. I know for the past few days, I've craved the company of others, but haven't been able to enjoy that company because either I or they have had things to do.
I've found that stress is easier to handle when you are around others - maybe not complaining all the time, but even just being in the company of others. Think of war movies: when the huge battle scene comes, every single one of the men is quiet, preparing for the first shot to be heard. Each of them are facing their own fears and demons, but they are together.
Creating an army is creating a group of people on whom you can depend on in those times of trial; a "no man left behind" culture is created. Not to mention, that during those really happy times, they are there to share it with you. Happiness grows. Lovely, isn't it?
So create an army. It will be a force against all that is bad and something that will create joy. Just don't start any wars against any people.
Peace!
-Nicole
Plans for World Domination
1. Purchase copious amounts of hair dye.
2. Find friends who will allow me to dye their hair.
3. Dye their hair funky colors.
4. Take over people's blogs.
This blog has been taken over by a special guest blogger, Andrew (who has a blog here) . . . Nicole is currently up to her hands in hair and hair dye. She is currently dying someone's hair blue. She just finished up with Erin's, a friend of ours. She might be doing mine next. Not sure. I'm debating it. It's temporary and wouldn't be much hair that was dyed. Plus, I've wanted to do stuff with my hair for a while. It is almost the end of semester too, so a change would be amazing to start Finals Week off with a bang.
2. Find friends who will allow me to dye their hair.
3. Dye their hair funky colors.
4. Take over people's blogs.
This blog has been taken over by a special guest blogger, Andrew (who has a blog here) . . . Nicole is currently up to her hands in hair and hair dye. She is currently dying someone's hair blue. She just finished up with Erin's, a friend of ours. She might be doing mine next. Not sure. I'm debating it. It's temporary and wouldn't be much hair that was dyed. Plus, I've wanted to do stuff with my hair for a while. It is almost the end of semester too, so a change would be amazing to start Finals Week off with a bang.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Nervous
1. Let someone hack your computer or smart phone. It's interesting to see what they do.
2. Don't let anyone who you don't trust hack your computer or phone.
3. It really is quiet on campus with all the choir kids gone.
4. Don't let nerves get the best of you.
Last night, I had a meeting at my church for a trip I am taking next summer. When I got back to my dorm, I found I had a new text message from Megan: "hey, wanna help me with my speech?" Unlike me, Megan has terrible stage-fright and today, she had an eight-minute speech to present to her oral communications class. We ended up spending about two hours practicing, critiquing, and fixing her speech.
When I ran into Megan this morning at breakfast, she was riddled fear and nerves. Her leg was twitching, her fingers were tapping on the table, and her eyes were darting every-which way. "Megan, what's wrong?" She then looked up at me and said something along the lines that she just wanted it to be over. I found this whole situation to be a bit funny - all that she was doing was giving a speech to her friends on a topic she was passionate about. What was there to be nervous about?
I guess I am coming from the perspective of a person who has spent the last seven years performing on stage and competing. But I wasn't always this way...I used to be scared of even talking with people. I was afraid I was going to stumble over words, then people wouldn't understand me and then I wouldn't be able to get anywhere. I now know this is completely untrue - I was going to stumble, but all I needed to do was start again and not worry too much about my mess up.
Whenever I help someone with a speech or performance (or even when I practice things), they react to their mess-up by either making a funny noise, cussing, or letting their shoulders slump. This does not help with the nerves...it only perpetuates it.
Nerves aren't just present in speeches...they're present in life. Right now, I am heading into finals week. I only have one final, but that's Spanish and I'm not ready at all. I also have a ton of projects to do (a scale-model of a set, a lighting design, a final paper, a revision of a paper, another final paper, and a Spanish oral exam). There is a lot for me to be nervous about. If I don't use my time wisely, I am afraid I won't do well in the class.
But letting myself be nervous about it all won't help. Like Megan has said before on a this post, you have plunge yourself into your work. Nerves get you no where - all it does is take up your time and create a mess of problems you don't need.
Don't let nerves get the best of you.
Peace!
-Nicole
2. Don't let anyone who you don't trust hack your computer or phone.
3. It really is quiet on campus with all the choir kids gone.
4. Don't let nerves get the best of you.
Last night, I had a meeting at my church for a trip I am taking next summer. When I got back to my dorm, I found I had a new text message from Megan: "hey, wanna help me with my speech?" Unlike me, Megan has terrible stage-fright and today, she had an eight-minute speech to present to her oral communications class. We ended up spending about two hours practicing, critiquing, and fixing her speech.
When I ran into Megan this morning at breakfast, she was riddled fear and nerves. Her leg was twitching, her fingers were tapping on the table, and her eyes were darting every-which way. "Megan, what's wrong?" She then looked up at me and said something along the lines that she just wanted it to be over. I found this whole situation to be a bit funny - all that she was doing was giving a speech to her friends on a topic she was passionate about. What was there to be nervous about?
I guess I am coming from the perspective of a person who has spent the last seven years performing on stage and competing. But I wasn't always this way...I used to be scared of even talking with people. I was afraid I was going to stumble over words, then people wouldn't understand me and then I wouldn't be able to get anywhere. I now know this is completely untrue - I was going to stumble, but all I needed to do was start again and not worry too much about my mess up.
Whenever I help someone with a speech or performance (or even when I practice things), they react to their mess-up by either making a funny noise, cussing, or letting their shoulders slump. This does not help with the nerves...it only perpetuates it.
Nerves aren't just present in speeches...they're present in life. Right now, I am heading into finals week. I only have one final, but that's Spanish and I'm not ready at all. I also have a ton of projects to do (a scale-model of a set, a lighting design, a final paper, a revision of a paper, another final paper, and a Spanish oral exam). There is a lot for me to be nervous about. If I don't use my time wisely, I am afraid I won't do well in the class.
But letting myself be nervous about it all won't help. Like Megan has said before on a this post, you have plunge yourself into your work. Nerves get you no where - all it does is take up your time and create a mess of problems you don't need.
Don't let nerves get the best of you.
Peace!
-Nicole
Hack Attack!
1. Smart phones are fun.
2. Trust me.
3. It's so quiet without the choir kids.
4. Speeches are not fatal.
I just hacked Nicole. She's paranoid now I think...
Have an epic day!
-Megan
2. Trust me.
3. It's so quiet without the choir kids.
4. Speeches are not fatal.
I just hacked Nicole. She's paranoid now I think...
Have an epic day!
-Megan
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Empathetic Tendencies
1. Write when inspired, even if that's all over the back of the article you're discussing.
2. Stretch your mind, even if it hurts.
3. Finding out your final paper is due two days later than you thought is a good feeling.
4. As finals get closer, look for more people wearing glasses and exhibiting jittery behavior.
It's Wednesday. It's Megan.
Sometimes (but not all the time) people turn to me with issues they're facing. Sometimes I jump the gun and run around looking for my cape so I can fly to the rescue, and other times I just try to make sure I'm around if they need me. Someone called me an enabler the other day which really, really, really threw me for a loop. The absolute last thing I'd ever want is for how I naturally react to certain situations to do more harm than good. I mean, I think I try to work towards resolving the issue and not just pacifying the outcome... I think.
I started thinking, what am I enabling? What are we all enabling when we listen to or try to help others make it through their problems? Of course it depends on the situation, but from certain Psychological perspectives, disclosing painful secrets, allowing the release of emotions, and letting yourself be open and honest with someone you trust are all positive behaviors associated with better health outcomes. That's what we enable people to do when we make ourselves available to listen.
I'm discussing empathy in my inquiry class, and as humans, our capacity for empathy serves the evolutionary purpose of creating a deep connection between us. Our brains are even wired for empathy with "mirror" neurons: for example, if you see a spider on someone's arm, your same neurons will fire as if to tell you there is a spider on your own arm.
We experience empathy because our fates are intricately intertwined. It is how we survive both as individuals and as a species. We have this need to feel connected and share experiences. Along with this conscious desire to share experiences, we also experience an unconscious ability to share in, and try to ease, someone else's suffering because we know ourselves what it's like to suffer. Humans feel the need to make life more tolerable and livable for someone else, sometimes because it's the right and compassionate thing to do, but also because we know we would want someone else to do it for us. Sometimes we acknowledge someone else's suffering in the hopes that they'll acknowledge ours--and everyone suffers in some way... at least according to the Four Noble Truths found in Buddhist teachings.
Empathy arguably arises from the acknowledgement of our own mortality. We recognize we don't have unlimited time, and so seeing or knowing that someone else is in pain is painful to us. There is an automatic desire to take on and relieve someone of that suffering. My roommate told me I have a savior complex. Well, so be it. If what I do gets people somewhere, then so be it. Empathy, luckily for us, is not confined to suffering. We have the ability to share in and experience the success, happiness, and sometimes sheer giddiness of others. Like I said, our fate and experiences are connected more than one would think.
We may all be facing our own demons, and we may all need to conquer our own demons, but that doesn't mean we can't fight them together. If you have my back, I have yours.
I leave you with a poem by John Donne as well as a link to the video that inspired much of this post.
Be well and love deeply,
-Megan
No Man is an Island
No man is an island entire of itself; every man
is a piece of the continent, a part of the main;
if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe
is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as
well as a manor of thy friends or of thine
own were; any man's death diminishes me,
because I am involved in mankind.
And therefore never send to know for whom
the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.
The Empathetic Civilisation
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7AWnfFRc7g
2. Stretch your mind, even if it hurts.
3. Finding out your final paper is due two days later than you thought is a good feeling.
4. As finals get closer, look for more people wearing glasses and exhibiting jittery behavior.
It's Wednesday. It's Megan.
Sometimes (but not all the time) people turn to me with issues they're facing. Sometimes I jump the gun and run around looking for my cape so I can fly to the rescue, and other times I just try to make sure I'm around if they need me. Someone called me an enabler the other day which really, really, really threw me for a loop. The absolute last thing I'd ever want is for how I naturally react to certain situations to do more harm than good. I mean, I think I try to work towards resolving the issue and not just pacifying the outcome... I think.
I started thinking, what am I enabling? What are we all enabling when we listen to or try to help others make it through their problems? Of course it depends on the situation, but from certain Psychological perspectives, disclosing painful secrets, allowing the release of emotions, and letting yourself be open and honest with someone you trust are all positive behaviors associated with better health outcomes. That's what we enable people to do when we make ourselves available to listen.
I'm discussing empathy in my inquiry class, and as humans, our capacity for empathy serves the evolutionary purpose of creating a deep connection between us. Our brains are even wired for empathy with "mirror" neurons: for example, if you see a spider on someone's arm, your same neurons will fire as if to tell you there is a spider on your own arm.
We experience empathy because our fates are intricately intertwined. It is how we survive both as individuals and as a species. We have this need to feel connected and share experiences. Along with this conscious desire to share experiences, we also experience an unconscious ability to share in, and try to ease, someone else's suffering because we know ourselves what it's like to suffer. Humans feel the need to make life more tolerable and livable for someone else, sometimes because it's the right and compassionate thing to do, but also because we know we would want someone else to do it for us. Sometimes we acknowledge someone else's suffering in the hopes that they'll acknowledge ours--and everyone suffers in some way... at least according to the Four Noble Truths found in Buddhist teachings.
Empathy arguably arises from the acknowledgement of our own mortality. We recognize we don't have unlimited time, and so seeing or knowing that someone else is in pain is painful to us. There is an automatic desire to take on and relieve someone of that suffering. My roommate told me I have a savior complex. Well, so be it. If what I do gets people somewhere, then so be it. Empathy, luckily for us, is not confined to suffering. We have the ability to share in and experience the success, happiness, and sometimes sheer giddiness of others. Like I said, our fate and experiences are connected more than one would think.
We may all be facing our own demons, and we may all need to conquer our own demons, but that doesn't mean we can't fight them together. If you have my back, I have yours.
I leave you with a poem by John Donne as well as a link to the video that inspired much of this post.
Be well and love deeply,
-Megan
No Man is an Island
No man is an island entire of itself; every man
is a piece of the continent, a part of the main;
if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe
is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as
well as a manor of thy friends or of thine
own were; any man's death diminishes me,
because I am involved in mankind.
And therefore never send to know for whom
the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.
The Empathetic Civilisation
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7AWnfFRc7g
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Note: Touch
My friend Sally came up to me the other day and flat out said, "You have a people-touching problem." See, I have this weird quirk where I need to have physical contact with someone when I am around them. Don't take this the wrong way; I mean simple, light, innocent touch - like arm to arm or palm to palm. It's not romantic nor is it to gain something. I am constantly touching my friends - whether it be poking them, making them run into me, or sitting close to them. Most of the time is ok, but other times, my friends turn to me and say, "You have a people-touching problem."
I have no idea why I love innocent physical human contact so much. Maybe it's because I didn't get enough when I was younger. Maybe it's because I was too afraid of being hurt. Maybe I felt I would be rejected. Who knows. But I do know that now, all I want is touch that has no point other than to feel another person's pulse and warmth against mine. I need to know that people are real. I want to know that my heart is not the only one beating in the world.
Why is it such taboo to hold someone's hand that isn't your romantic partner? Where along the line of things did holding hands become specific to romantic partners? I love to hold hands - the feeling of immediate connection and being able to feel their pulse. I can talk to someone, but sometimes I feel like I am so far removed from them that I can't relate to them. But putting my hand in theirs, they become real and human. It is a reassuring squeeze of the hand.
The benefits of human contact is immense. A baby needs to be held to know they are safe. Their mother's heartbeat is something that will calm a fussy baby easily, but that cannot be done unless the baby is near the mother's chest. Even now, when I'm feeling lonely or sad, a hug makes it better.
I may not know the science behind it, but I know for me, touch is what really connects us with each other. You truly cannot know if someone is real and solid or just an image unless you touch them. Once you touch them, they become real. Think of movies when a couple or two friends see each other for the first time in years. They slowly approach each other and put a hand somewhere on the person (face, shoulder, arm, etc.). They need to know they are real and they simply aren't a mirage.
We all need to know we are not alone in this universe. Sometimes words aren't enough to keep us sane; sometimes holding someone's hand keeps us grounded.
Let yourself touch and be touched - emotionally and physically. It's innocent and absolutely lovely.
Peace!
-Nicole
I have no idea why I love innocent physical human contact so much. Maybe it's because I didn't get enough when I was younger. Maybe it's because I was too afraid of being hurt. Maybe I felt I would be rejected. Who knows. But I do know that now, all I want is touch that has no point other than to feel another person's pulse and warmth against mine. I need to know that people are real. I want to know that my heart is not the only one beating in the world.
Why is it such taboo to hold someone's hand that isn't your romantic partner? Where along the line of things did holding hands become specific to romantic partners? I love to hold hands - the feeling of immediate connection and being able to feel their pulse. I can talk to someone, but sometimes I feel like I am so far removed from them that I can't relate to them. But putting my hand in theirs, they become real and human. It is a reassuring squeeze of the hand.
The benefits of human contact is immense. A baby needs to be held to know they are safe. Their mother's heartbeat is something that will calm a fussy baby easily, but that cannot be done unless the baby is near the mother's chest. Even now, when I'm feeling lonely or sad, a hug makes it better.
I may not know the science behind it, but I know for me, touch is what really connects us with each other. You truly cannot know if someone is real and solid or just an image unless you touch them. Once you touch them, they become real. Think of movies when a couple or two friends see each other for the first time in years. They slowly approach each other and put a hand somewhere on the person (face, shoulder, arm, etc.). They need to know they are real and they simply aren't a mirage.
We all need to know we are not alone in this universe. Sometimes words aren't enough to keep us sane; sometimes holding someone's hand keeps us grounded.
Let yourself touch and be touched - emotionally and physically. It's innocent and absolutely lovely.
Peace!
-Nicole
Just Be
1. Secret Santa gift exchanges are exciting.
2. The effects of five-hour energy drinks are funny, especially if you are watching it happen to someone else.
3. Don't skip breakfast...not a good thing.
4. Just let yourself be.
Talking feels like an effort today. It is like I feel like I have nothing to say to people and everything I would say would be trivial, self-centered, and tedious. I know that whatever I say will be a bit hurtful (which I don't want to happen). All I want to do is stop talking and just ignore my own thoughts. I'm not quite sure why I'm in this mood; it just is. I am normally the bubbly, weird, and energetic person who can carry a conversation fairly well, but today, not so much.
Sometimes we just need a day to just be - to listen to conversations, watch interactions, and let the world spin around you. I think we talk too much. Over the past few months, I have been finding my voice. I am now more vocal in social situations and I'm not as afraid to make a fool of myself. But sometimes it goes a bit more beyond that and becomes a "listen to me!" thing, which I have never really been a fan of. There are times when we should use our voice - to speak out on injustice or to bring new ideas to the table. But days like today make me realize that there are other ways to speak out: silence.
In theatre, I've always been taught that silence speaks more than actions and words. When I competed in speech, I was always praised for my use of pauses. It gave the audience time to react to what my character was saying and anticipate what was coming next. So many ideas are thrown around and no time is given to ponder them and wonder what is next.
I also think that we lose touch with each other - in the emotional and physical sense. We get so caught up in the daily adventures that we don't allow ourselves to just be together. Emotions are easy to sense in each other when you sit in silence. Human contact is an amazing thing too. I love having physical touch - innocent and loving. Even simply sitting close to each other so that you can feel their warmth and pulse or even holding hands. To know that they are there and living and breathing just like you is one of the greatest comforts.
So maybe the weird mood I'm in right now is a good thing, provided that I use my time to just listen, watch, and feel another's pulse.
Just allow yourself to be in people's presence.
Peace!
-Nicole
2. The effects of five-hour energy drinks are funny, especially if you are watching it happen to someone else.
3. Don't skip breakfast...not a good thing.
4. Just let yourself be.
Talking feels like an effort today. It is like I feel like I have nothing to say to people and everything I would say would be trivial, self-centered, and tedious. I know that whatever I say will be a bit hurtful (which I don't want to happen). All I want to do is stop talking and just ignore my own thoughts. I'm not quite sure why I'm in this mood; it just is. I am normally the bubbly, weird, and energetic person who can carry a conversation fairly well, but today, not so much.
Sometimes we just need a day to just be - to listen to conversations, watch interactions, and let the world spin around you. I think we talk too much. Over the past few months, I have been finding my voice. I am now more vocal in social situations and I'm not as afraid to make a fool of myself. But sometimes it goes a bit more beyond that and becomes a "listen to me!" thing, which I have never really been a fan of. There are times when we should use our voice - to speak out on injustice or to bring new ideas to the table. But days like today make me realize that there are other ways to speak out: silence.
In theatre, I've always been taught that silence speaks more than actions and words. When I competed in speech, I was always praised for my use of pauses. It gave the audience time to react to what my character was saying and anticipate what was coming next. So many ideas are thrown around and no time is given to ponder them and wonder what is next.
I also think that we lose touch with each other - in the emotional and physical sense. We get so caught up in the daily adventures that we don't allow ourselves to just be together. Emotions are easy to sense in each other when you sit in silence. Human contact is an amazing thing too. I love having physical touch - innocent and loving. Even simply sitting close to each other so that you can feel their warmth and pulse or even holding hands. To know that they are there and living and breathing just like you is one of the greatest comforts.
So maybe the weird mood I'm in right now is a good thing, provided that I use my time to just listen, watch, and feel another's pulse.
Just allow yourself to be in people's presence.
Peace!
-Nicole
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Best Facebook Hack Ever
1. 3 hour naps are glorious.
2. Twizzlers are yummy.
3. Don't leave your computer open...your Facebook will be hacked.
4. Sometimes crazy things happen.
-Nicole
2. Twizzlers are yummy.
3. Don't leave your computer open...your Facebook will be hacked.
4. Sometimes crazy things happen.
So Megan left her computer open in my dorm while she ran back to her dorm to grab a few things. So, I hacked her Facebook, Tumblr, and Twitter. (A 'hack' is when you pose as a person on their profile, often done when the person is gone.) I took my opportunity to write something on her Facebook. So instead of writing another post, I thought I would share what I wrote. Here you go.
Hello world. I am Nicole and Megan made the mistake of leaving her compute open in my dorm while she was running back to her's to grab some stuff. So, I took this opportunity to hack her Facebook and post something for the world to see.
Let me start off by saying it's been quite the adventure the past few months of college. I grew up near Concordia (only about 15 minutes away), so I didn't expect to experience too much change. But boy was I wrong. I grew up an only child living with just my mom. Now I am living with 30 girls, sharing one bathroom and having to figure out a balance with them. I have met people who I never would have had the opportunity to meet otherwise, even though I am only 15 minutes away from home. One of those people is Megan. Megan and I were talking a few days ago about how we probably would have never been friends before college. We aren't completely sure why this is true, but somehow the circumstances and timing were right to make this friendship work.
So here's my little message to you: sometimes crazy things happen. Sometimes you end up tackling someone to the ground and think that now that person is going to hate you...but then you end up connected at the heart and spending hours talking about anything and everything. (Yay Megan!) Or maybe sometimes you are at a football game and you are a little too hyper for your own good and the person next to you leans over and says, "Do you speak whale?" and then you end up being "those girls" on your floor that everyone has to tell to shut up because you are laughing too loud. (Yay Melissa!)
The thing is all this wouldn't have happened if I hadn't let myself be a bit crazy. Maybe sometimes you need to be a bit insane to become sane...who knows?
Well, Megan's back and is currently sitting on a bed, writing what I'm sure is an poem or thought. It's really cool to see - she's sort of in her element.
Ok, that's all I've got. Thanks for reading my hack note.
Hello world. I am Nicole and Megan made the mistake of leaving her compute open in my dorm while she was running back to her's to grab some stuff. So, I took this opportunity to hack her Facebook and post something for the world to see.
Let me start off by saying it's been quite the adventure the past few months of college. I grew up near Concordia (only about 15 minutes away), so I didn't expect to experience too much change. But boy was I wrong. I grew up an only child living with just my mom. Now I am living with 30 girls, sharing one bathroom and having to figure out a balance with them. I have met people who I never would have had the opportunity to meet otherwise, even though I am only 15 minutes away from home. One of those people is Megan. Megan and I were talking a few days ago about how we probably would have never been friends before college. We aren't completely sure why this is true, but somehow the circumstances and timing were right to make this friendship work.
So here's my little message to you: sometimes crazy things happen. Sometimes you end up tackling someone to the ground and think that now that person is going to hate you...but then you end up connected at the heart and spending hours talking about anything and everything. (Yay Megan!) Or maybe sometimes you are at a football game and you are a little too hyper for your own good and the person next to you leans over and says, "Do you speak whale?" and then you end up being "those girls" on your floor that everyone has to tell to shut up because you are laughing too loud. (Yay Melissa!)
The thing is all this wouldn't have happened if I hadn't let myself be a bit crazy. Maybe sometimes you need to be a bit insane to become sane...who knows?
Well, Megan's back and is currently sitting on a bed, writing what I'm sure is an poem or thought. It's really cool to see - she's sort of in her element.
Ok, that's all I've got. Thanks for reading my hack note.
Peace!
-Nicole
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)